I wonder if all of the nights I blacked out will be revealed to me when I die. Have you ever thought about that?
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
Walmart at night is scary enough without having to run into people you've slept with
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
my mom called me mid shot and i accidentally answered and kept calling her my own name. somehow i thought that would help the situation.
You better fucking tell me or I'm turning blow job week into go fuck yourself week.
There is a 97.5% chance that my sketchy roommate is also a hooker.
So when can I meet her?
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
I hate drunk me more than anyone else in this world
A person can only vomit Fireball so much before they quit it forever
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
Randomize
