Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
Who goes to Church hungover
Those who weren't lucky enough to go still drunk
white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
it tastes like there's a party in my mouth and everyone is throwing up
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
For her birthday she wants to, " try something different with our butts a funnel and a bottle of whiskey"
I feel like if you're funneling natty lights on a Wednesday at 2:30pm at the apartment complex pool during finals week, you probably don't have your priorities straight.
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
Also, I found your gauge.
I found it under my pillow like a gift from the Sex Fairy.
I told my grandmother all I want is a nice guy who likes to be tied up.
I should be rewarded with oreos for not turning into a raging cunt.
I wonder how many people I can tell that he has one nut before he finds out it's me spreading it.
I'm sorry I was just sleeping on the kitchen floor I'm too dead to think
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
Randomize
