her vagine was all disorganized.
Dude, way to rack up $80 in pornos in the hotel room last night, and not tell me before I got blindsided at check out.
Heh. Guess I ordered some porno last night. Heh.
I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
Just saw the true definition of the muffin top and camel toe all on one person at the DC zoo... Tried to take a pic but she got away..
but the lizard people decide everything anyway
I'm going to have to call in sick tomorrow. After this weekend, there's no way I can handle hearing the accountants talk about double entry without puking.
i just declared my major based on how close the department building was to our apartment. laziness has been brought to a new level
As a general rule, drunkenness and gymnastics do not mix.
I have the perfect view of a sexy blonde in yoga pants stretching from the shoulder press machine. I'll be here all night. So glad I came high.
Ur here with me in spirit. Now run free. Run free
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
She only fucks to metal. I don't know whether to marry her or run for the hills.
Well to me, someone is not really my friend until we go to a mcdonalds drunk at 4am. It's like a right of passage
…wtf were in those pills mom gave me
No no no, I want to share him with you. Think of it as me sharing a piece of delicious pie with you. He was THAT GOOD.
Randomize
