i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
I ran into my parents house and stole a bottle of vodka last night...Apparently left them a note that read "DRUNK. TOOK VODKA. BRING MORE."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
How much do souls cost? I feel like I need one if those.
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
Doing coke by yourself isn't as fun. Even when you're watching a James Franco movie.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The sex was so good I feel like I could run a triathlon, hit big at the casino, and defeat ISIS.
The one that slept in my truck and you peed in his face?
Because of you I'm damaged goods. I'm a fucking soup can and you dropped me.
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
Vegas never ceases to amaze me. Hung out with a stripper from ATL all night and got nuthin, but the next night meet a bride-to-be who gives me a bj in the elevator.
I woke up and there was a huge blow up palm tree in my bed...
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