She said her name was "party"
These 3 days between Christmas and new years when all the bosses are on vacation are essentially a competition to see who can do the least amount of work
Taking the airport shuttle drunk should not happen this often in my life.
Is it weird being in the house without any roommates?
Nah, just masturbating louder
...She then said get into the spirit and started making firecracker noises while having sex
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
This is what my life has come to. Drinking champagne alone yelling at the dog because no one wants to hang out with me
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever"
he has the ass of a greek god and he made me breakfast
This might be the worst thing you've ever done.
Really? I feel like I've done worse. Guess I gotta step my game up.
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
Yeah well I fucked my ex on a sink last night soooo booty calls for us all
Randomize
