Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
i made it my goal to pee in the sink of every apartment we went to last night. i didnt use the toilet once
You act like pregaming preseason hockey is a crime. Come on man, get fucked up and watch pucks. It rhymes so well it has to go together. DOS EQUIS Y DEVILS!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I poured everyones drinks into the ice bucket and then stuck my face in it. Apparently I'm a greedy drunk.
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
Well I found out I was essentially dumped and replaced by a hipster and apparently offered a girl $95 to go out with me. In the spirit of the Olympics I will not be spending any time on the medal stand.
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
He just took a bite of each taco bell burrito and hid them throughout my apartment. this was 2 weeks ago and have found 30 burritos so far
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tomorrow's Mother's Day and the only thing I can afford is beer and the McDonalds dollar menu. Do you think a Budweiser and a Big Mac says thank you for me fucking up your life since 1990?
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
So, random question. How much should you tip a Lyft driver when you realized you've fucked his sister? Asking for a friend.
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
Randomize