My bottle opener just broke off in the cork
They don't teach how to cope w these situations in boy scouts
Yeah I guess I was Pocahontus. If she were a trifling drunk who hung out in her undies, with possible brain damage.
Drunk and had dance off with 8 year old. Lost. Still drinking
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
you were on all fours yelling at the earth to stop spinning.
There's a naked kid on the floor on your side of the bed. Don't freak out when you wake up. I think we need to fix the lock on the door...
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
I am getting drunk. And i'm going to paint my face and slide down the stairs like Pochahontas. Goodbye
Fairly certain I cracked a rib. Masturbation is not for the weak. I die now.
But break dance skills will only take you so far
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
We were basically fucking on the dance floor. People kept buying us drinks. It really only encouraged us.
I don't fucking know. I'm out stimulating the economy. Not locked in a room with a marker board.
Oh at the liquor store again?
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
Fuck my life he IS a stripper, Ive been sleeping with a stripper named Phoenix. damnit, I knew the sex was too good
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