somethin' about having sex in my parents bed makes me feel like l'm finally an adult.
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
You called in. Quitter. You stayed at home naked drinking again didnt you.
I want to break up with him.....but he has a george forman grill...like I need that
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently I texted my high school english teacher asking her to tell me what logical fallacies she taught us three years ago.
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
My dad just asked Siri to "help me find my daughters dignity."
If you were my daughter, I'd do the same thing.
I tried to interpretive dance to Candy Shop to stop the awkwardness.
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ur mom makes the best bacon
WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY HOUSE
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
This Halloween will be different. I'm just here to get shitfaced, not troll around looking for slutty nun pussy.
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
But seriously like how many girls do you know that will do that on the first date?
One?
ONE! And it was was glorious!
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