In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
I fink we're distracting them from bumping the proverbial uglies
remind me to tell you about the ham sandwich empire im building
some guy just walked up to the bench i was on, backflipped off of it, gave me his number and walked away....i love this city
she was like the girl next door.. if you lived next door to a whorehouse
We did lines off of a Whitney Houston CD case. That makes everything okay.
Sitting in a bubble bath with my bong, how's your morning?
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
At what point did you think the cops were actually coming to hang out with us
You cant hold me accountable for my actions when im high.
broke the door off of my fridge tryin to have a indoor rodeo
Things I learned last night: 1. Bacardi 151 is a one-way ticket to the toilet, 2. It is possible for a human being to turn into Mount Vesuvius
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
Clearly I'm trying to change the world one fuck at a time
you DO IT for the people
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