I can't watch pbs sober anymore
he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
Baconater + red wine = first meal of the day
he emptied an entire bag of goldfish onto the bed and rolled around yelling the theme to jaws trying to eat them
21 People Confess What It’s Really Like At An Orgy
the man who designed bathrooms to have toilets within easy puking distance from the shower is my hero
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
I had to ask him for the scissors while I was in the shower. My hood piercing was stuck in my loofah.
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
Won't anyone wonder why I'm mute, bald, and wearing an eye patch?
These 15 Honest Illustrations Show What Women Do When No One Is Watching
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
My biggest accomplishment thus far this summer is having sex 5 weeks after hip surgery.
This is what happens when you live with someone you met on Grindr
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
I got dressed on his front steps, peed on his neighbors lawn, then did a shoeless walk of shame home at 5am...
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude