Heybabeimwearingurpanties
What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
You would only drink if the space jam soundtrack was playing, you thought it was hilarious that before every shot you said "y'all ready for this".
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
Like theyre better than no shoes. I'm sitting her balls naked playing xbox in nothing but crocs with the fur
Taking advantage of alcohol's depressant capabilities to curtail my fever. SCIENCE!
I got so stoned last night I thought I was in second grade again
The bad news is I fucked my exes girlfriend. The good news is I100% understand why he left me
Brightest idea yet: lets drink enough at ladies-drink-free nights to make up for the cost of tampons. Breaking even on having vaginas!
I feel like the universe head butted me in my balls. That hungover.
.... My lady balls. Cuz I'm a lady.
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
I mean I faked it but he could answer my texts
Randomize
