been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
He just kept telling me how to do certain things. It was like I was fucking my sex ed teacher
Just had a drunken guest at my hotel threaten to "throw a fuckin fireball at my face"
wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
I mean, I don't even call it a hangover anymore. It's just morning.
We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
I always have trouble explaining my life decisions to people over the age of 30.
I woke up covered in his pee. And then he poked me on Facebook.
Is adulthood just morning sex and then walking through the grocery store 20 min later looking for something to take to work for lunch?
...and then running into your dad at said grocery store...
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
It's settled. One of us is going to bang her brother. The world demands justice and he's hot. We'll be the justice league if it were made of alcoholic whores
I don't know how guys can take themselves seriously when they see themselves naked
So today was the first day i've been sober since Wednesday according to my roommate!
I have vodka, fruit gushers, and health insurance. Let's party.
Cockblock successful. That's for pouring nacho cheese on my flatscreen, asshole.
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