Ehh boy. FML. she was unattractively large.
i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
They thought I was the paid stripper pretty much, and a lady tried to set me up with her nephew and then wanted to get my number for lesbian daughter... A typical night for me
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
you left a paper here that says 'to do list' but it looks like you just wrote "drink a bunch of cough syrup and watch Who's the Boss" like 60 times
I just had a boat ride of shame. With Senior Citizens.
We left your bucket of puke on your doorstep to clean out yourself. You're welcome.
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
Lets play hurricane shelter. And the shelter is my bed, and we forgot our clothes.
I feel like the universe head butted me in my balls. That hungover.
.... My lady balls. Cuz I'm a lady.
okay we need to get tested.
no YOU need to get tested. I'm just going along for the ride.
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
I'm too drunk to make ramen. What the fuck is this.
Randomize
