Apparently mediocre decisions were made last night. I woke up alone in my own bed with my fridge defrosted.
And I didn't go to bed alone. I am buckets of fail.
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
you yelled "who's job is it to keep me from breaking shit" and then immediately ripped off the molding as you fell down the stairs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like this has turned into my work. But if I get paid sitting under a desk, that's perfectly fine with me.
if a CSI technician examined our hotel room with a black light he'd think we hit the Pulse button a DNA blender without a lid
Not many people can say they've been photo bombed by an antelope. I sure did.
You do it and I'll burn these mermaid pants so help me God.
I got my period on eclipse day. I'm officially in line with the moon.
there is glitter all over my balls
Randomize