if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
I think I'm pregnant with his hipster baby. It keeps kicking my stomach to the beat of mgmt songs.
i thought to myself 'what a productive day'. then i realized all ive done is one load of laundry and shaved my balls.
He set 8 alarms to make sure I took my birth control on time..
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I'm sorry. I really don't see what's wrong with pregaming before a wine tasting.This champagne won't drink itself.
The wine tasting is just for charity anyways...
Wish i knew who the f is sending me pics of asian newborns.
I'll sleep on the bed... The couch is now designated banging area. Any banging performed outside of that area will be subject to fines of cleaning up stains.
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
So I saw the nuva ring just lying on the counter at Planned Parenthood...did u know it's just a ring? I could go to the Dollar tree buy a plastic bracelet and shove it up there instead.
You do that. Then go have lots of unprotected with your harem of booty calls and see how that works out for you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
$645 later, she's throwing up in my washroom and asking for a cab. Hooker are soooo much cheaper.
Whatever, I used my iphone to send an Escalade to pick up a booty call last week. For free. It is futuristic as fuck out here.
I just made a drink so ill shit. It's goona be great. Ill tell you about it when you get here. Get pumped. For my shit.
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
Your heart isn't making stupid decisions... your penis is outsmarting your brain. Stop fucking her!
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