does the new i-phone have a pregnancy test app?
Ohh god. I'm so nervous. This is terrible. He just introduced me as "the best girlfriend of his life" and Jenny as his "sexual roomate"
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
She kept saying how cute and adorable I was. I felt like a care bear getting a blowjob
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
Totally shot down my boss for sex today. Approaching this weekend with a clear conscience and an untouched vagina.
I bought new panties to console myself ... you know, because I am going to lose my ovaries. Well, if I don't die of a heart attack first. But at least when the EMS folks find me, I'll be finely dressed from the waist down.
note to self: do not snort crushed up caffeine pills in the bathroom by yourself when ur super shit faced, ur face will fucking hate you in the morning.
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
I almost wrecked my car because of a guy in skinny jeans had a boner
Just did the "lost my phone, need #'s" post and I got a text saying "go ahead and save me as Ashley-DD because I know you will anyway. I think I love her.
Why does my mask smell like doritoes?
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