Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
Don't worry about it. I've taken so much Plan B, my uterus is purely for show now.
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
dont be like that, i wasnt picking him over you. I was picking multiple orgasms over zoolander.
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
The maintenance guy asked for a box to stand on to reach the ceiling. All I could offer him was a keg.
I just realized, I'm going to be on my period for the end of the world. FUCK.
So that groomsmen was naked under his kilt. Also I just had sex in the elevator. And yes, those two updates are definitely related.
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
Woke up in the ER with a nurse holding my tongue together inside of my mouth and a shattered jaw, the last thing I remember is opening the 151, care to fill me in?
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
VIVE LA RESISTANCE
Oh god, what now?
Eh, it could have been worse. I may or may not have been wearing a jedi cloak while getting my dick sucked.
Randomize
