you left a giant bottle of vodka in my room from last night. does this serve as a parting gift or hush money?
Don't worry. I just took 2 benadryls and beat off. I'm practically sleep texting
They live so far away from me that not fucking them both would have been financially irresponsible
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's the only person who can pull off turning an outdoor patio heater tower into a stripper pole.
He gets creativity points for the hot sauce. But it may be awhile until my nipples forgive him
The two guys from next door helped him do a backflip. The ended up throwing him halfway through a ceiling tile. Don't worry, we fixed it with duct tape.
i was gonna do a lot worse than just throw cat food on you while you were passed out, but then you sleep vomited and i felt a little bad
She almost killed me. The shot she handed me had tacks in it. Wtf?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The van in front of me contains people having SEX. I am in full view of a SEX VAN.
And then he said, "let's have sex and I'll send you home with enchiladas."
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
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