I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
I just sold a pizza for the ability to listen to spice girls.
Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
I may or may not be drunk driving a golf cart. Vegaaaassssssss.
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
The freshman sure do fuck up the whataburger line at 2am
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
Sorry no. I've already promised my first single hookup to somebody.
I don't care if he's straight, his cock will be in my mouth by midnight. Like a closeted Cinderella.
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
Just told my boss I wasn't coming in to work because of a serious case of blue balls. Totally made having them worth it.
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
I'm really going to need you to stop yelling Campari.
Sorry, Geoff can’t come to his phone right now. He’s outside trying to show his dick to a bachelorette party bus with “DTF” written on the windows
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