this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
I told him we couldn't have sex because I was ovulating and "I come from fertile people."
He violated my cat. I was not impressed.
It is official. It's the year of doin married chicks. Similar to the year of virgins but without all the baggage.
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
Based on my body hair location, my ancestors had very cold hamstrings and very warm chests
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
my roommate woke me up with head. more awkward than it sounds.
If I call him daddy should I get him a father's day card? Serious question
90% sure I just opened a snapchat of you in a fuzzy bathrobe next to your ceiling collapsing
I felt like a slutty ass cruella devil driving your old car, And I got in a fight with your wipers
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
Let's be real, he was never going to be tall enough
Call me Sherlock Holmes, bitch.
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