do you remember putting condoms over both your hands and asking me if your fists would be too big.
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
We are, if nothing else, classy enough to leave our 10 mini bottles of wine in a polite line on the floor of the movie theater.
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
Not only is he in the circus, the man survived a near death experience and has an accent. She might as well have found a unicorn. This shit just doesn't happen in real life. Where did she meet this magical creature?
Trevor is horny so he just called me to tell me all the things that he would like to do with his future wife. That's a new one.
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
All I want is a guy who will love me and occasionally shave my balls.
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
I know I'm high, but the dude in target definitely just told me that it's best to walk through every door in life like you're a t-rex....
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
i just saw a man in the grocery, sitting on the floor, eating out of a galon sized tub of macaroni salad. We need to get on his level.
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
I just chased my birth control with Smirnoff. Shit's about to go down.
Randomize