I woke up in a stranger's bathtub with a broken shower curtain as my blanket.
Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
I saw you sitting on top of my car trying to row back home... Did you make it?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I make your heart skip a beat like that pivotal moment when you open a public toilet lid
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
We had sex on a dog bed..
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You tried to order fondue take-out.
From Taco Bell.
I need water and some morals
I need a fucking roommate.
You need a fucking babysitter.
Dude they are making elephants out of dollar bills. I'm way too high for this
So today was the first day i've been sober since Wednesday according to my roommate!
I think you know you’ve caught feelings when you’re asking a tinder boy his opinion about your current fuck buddy.
Randomize