Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
didn't know how to tell his mom I was confused about how long we'd been together because we banged for a full year before making it official
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
Now that I'm born again, I'm preserving my gift.
Your vagina isn't a White Elephant gift. You can't re-wrap it after it's already been given several times. That's white trash thinking.
You got the whole drunk bus to sing, "In The Jungle" while conducting with your glowsticks.
I'll just save you what dignity you have left by letting what happened die with your lack of memory and/or liver.
I sobered up and saw I was with the fat one and you had left laughing with the hot one. You're a terrible wingman, but an excellent manipulator
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
last thing I remember was someone walking in on me sitting in the bathtub listening and singing along to Britney spears "Till the world ends" on repeat.
I was going to be upset with you on moral grounds but then i realized free chocolate was involved
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
She did what?
Who. The correct term is she did who.
Did you see him? The correct term is definitely what.
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
Randomize
