going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
Just caught my dad doing coke in my bathroom again. Guess whose getting a new car for christmasss.
Smoked before work and just remembered i left pringles in my desk last time i was high. SCORE
So the contents found in my winter coats this year: coat 1, condom and 10$. Coat 2, condom and 75$ check. Coat 3, 2.05$ and a sunflower seed.
Obviously coat 3 had the best time since you used the condom and all of the money
Sometimes I feel like I should become a beautician purely for my ability to shave pretty shapes into my pubic hair.
I'm officially no longer allowed to make any of my own decisions regarding alcohol, men, or the combination of both. Thats up to you now. Do me proud.
My hungover walk of shame was interrupted by a stranger on a balcony throwing me a beer to shotgun... at 10 a.m....
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
Yeah, I'm just gonna try to repress that and remember him for his big dick and perfect jawline.
Dude, I got drunk and sexted his little sister by accident
He unliked all of my pictures on instagram, I don't know whats worse, the fact that he did it or the fact that I noticed..
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
So... I sharted on the plane. It was hard to maintain my composure and acted offended at the same time. I hate you for not cutting me off last night.
It may be a corded vibrator from the 90s but it gets the job DONE
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