Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
Hold on. She's wrapped herself in toilet paper and is scaring the dog.
Too many margaritas?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
...and all my boxers are outside in the snow because????
I have a feeling that watching gay porn with you was the reason I was dancing in a hurricane of floating dicks in my dream last night.
I just had to MC for a middle school event with jizz on my dress. I'm going to hell.
it was really awkward meeting your mom for the first time while i was still wearing the condom we were using.
i'm pretty sure i can feel a baby kicking just looking at him. if he didnt impregnate you, you officially have an iron-clad uterus.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
please remind me of this if i ever start out a night declaring my goal is to see how much american honey it takes for me to forget who i am again
My life has evolved from screwing randos, ok?
Yes. I am out of condoms. I kept filling them with glow paint and playing with them when I was on mushrooms, which resulted in me having unprotected sex last weekend
You drunk-dialed me and asked me to describe my burrito
I dunno what to tell you sport. Short of having a shock collar on, you're gonna wanna hook up with people.
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
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