yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
My mom walked down and caught me drinking by myself, watching the nanny at 3:30AM. I had no idea what to say
There needs to be a newsfeed for phones... A list of all my drunken calls, texts, BBMs, new contacts, pictures sent AND received, all in chronological order.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And then I interrupted the father of the groom, to ask if she was "ballet or pole" in the middle of his story about his niece, the dancer.
ive got a scarf tied around my face holding bags of hashbrowns to it, im too boss to care
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
Her mom offered to give me a lap dance. I was a guest, I couldn't say no.
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
You came out in nothing but lingerie and a Jedi robe claiming you needed more of those baby hot dog things or you were gonna go all Sith on us
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
Tonight’s your last chance for a danger free blowjob.
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
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