Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
I just figured you know how to drive a boat and I know how to get drunk. What can go wrong
She said I walked up to the McDonalds counter and ordered just a cup full of pickles then proceeded to offer some to everyone in the place.
When else am I ever going to have a chance to do lines with T-Pain?
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
no, but he did start crying. who the fuck is 30, covered in tattoos and crys about an ex? get your shit together, man.
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
I'm the only person I know who could have actual sex and then dream about my vibrator.
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
So anyways, we returned the toilet paper and decided to use the money for taco bell and slurpees instead...
Would it defeat the purpose of a run if I ran to McDonalds?
I don't know whether to cheer for the free bourbon, or cry from the screaming children.
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
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