I thnk I just saw a monkey walking a drunk guy.
i just wanna lock my vagina in a safe filled with bandaids and healthy things
What's the politically correct way of saying you've made someone your bitch?
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
you regret 100% of the tequila shots you do take. thats what gretzky meant to say
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
it was like teleporting. everytime i opened my eyes, i was somewhere different... usually the floor.
I just sent an "I'm sorry I forged a prescription in your name" email. It was one of the more awkward things I've done this week.
I was angry that a college kid had a new Audi
so I peed on it
Maybe because you rubbed my clit while we were making churros
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
Party bus got out of hand. Some guy pissed himself. Later, he couldn't find his house keys, so he kicked the back door in.
Saw throw up in the parking lot at work, glad I'm not the only one. But now the search begins.
Mary's wearing shades at her desk, brilliant!
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