So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
I just found a beer bottle in my xmas tree while disassembling it. God, I'm going to miss the holidays.
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
lets make a pact to never make a pregnancy pact
mondays should just be called national damage control day
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
This is the second time in a week I've woken up with your bra in my bed and I've had to sit and think about how it happened.
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
Dave called me blind fucking drunk thinking he was going to die from drinking with drake bell(wtf?) saying "it's all that drake motherfucker's fault" and later proceeded to tell me "you are my twitter"
The dentist walked in on me trying to bottle some laughing gas to take home with me. That high.
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
Note to self: NEVER have sex with anyone who is experiencing explosive diarrhea.
I've never been so happy to be celibate.
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