So we've decided on 'hamburger' as your code for tonight. If you add ketchup or fries, we know the threat level has escalated.
How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
did you know you can prarie-dog a fart??
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
The bong broke. we're having a little funeral followed by an inaugeration service for the new one
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
If you know any fat girls who would pay me for sex, I am low on money and morals right now
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
Dude, all I know is that I came out of this thing wearing a snorkel mask and completely covered in glitter and soap.
Then a third Canadian I didn't know showed up to the hotel room at like 3am. I let him sleep in our bed because he had pizza.
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
I knew how high you were when you put a french fry in your mouth and said 'fuck, this tastes like meat but feels blue.'
Randomize
