Id settle for living inside the pirates of the carribean ride.
WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOCIETY?!?!?!
... says the kid who took a shit in my parents dishwasher...
So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
its like she was born with a silver dick in her mouth
I know everyone screamed lady cop instead of cops. I wanted to apologize to her for our chauvinism
I just watched a woman in a full wedding dress and veil walk out of the chinese buffet...I no longer believe I have a problem, and am afraid I am underdressed.
Thanks man, but unless some hot chick comes in to work with a case of beer and offers me a head job, I'm pretty much screwed for New Years
SOS. HE HAS PASSED OUT AND IS LYING ON TOP OF ME. HE IS STILL INSIDE. HELP
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
How is it??
I'm drinking Gatorade out of a champagne flute.
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
But he's super into Jesus and I'm the devil. So we weren't meant to be
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
Randomize