he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
my goal in life is to wake up with my underwear on
Shit sorry. Maybe I wont give you this sweet ass fanny pack I found in my parents attic
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
I just tried to make cleaning gasoline off your shoes with toilet paper in the Chemistry Building bathroom look normal. I failed.
I am on top of a rooftop peeing on your freedom
She literally took off her shirt and ran out of the bar. When she ran back she smashed into the glass door with her face....That's got to be the best way to celebrate your 30th.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My now ex hook up buddy realized I was hooking up with others when she saw my spotify sex playlist making appearances on fb. fml
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
We can't go back there. Ever. No context required, just know it's true.
I'm glad we can *facepalm* it together over the married couple we fucked separately.
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
Ahaah! I just stole batteries from work for my vibrator. I am that person.
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