Food network will be on but we won't be watching
O by "watching" I mean "background noise"
Well its official I'm an idiot. I made out hardcore with an employee last night in our banquet room. Oh and got wasted at work. Oh and showed my staff squirrel on a trampoline.
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
Package from mother. Contents: Cookies, my old pokemon cards, and condoms. Note: "These have a July 2010 expiration date so give them away or use them with a gal that would be a great daughter in law. Love Mom" Love you too momma
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
Totally writing my paper on the toilet. Makes me miss you.
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
We’ve got a propane heater on our back porch if you want to come over and eat a McRib in peace
Randomize