Remind me that when I'm pregnant, I should NOT post vaginal dilation updates on my facebook. Ever.
im spending all my christmas money on new years parafanalia aka things I will ingest or lose by the next morning
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
Just talked to Kate. She said I called her on Friday night. She said I was crying for 5 minutes because we were parked in front of a fire hydrant.
Hide in the closet. if you hear me yell patato salad come out swinging.
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
Well I just finished dry heaving so I think breakfast is a little further out for me
I wrote a list of things I enjoy doing. So far it says "get high and go to museums."
Look, all I'm saying is that you're going to be a great Vodka Mom.
ya I went to the grocery store literally just for cheese and condoms
I just found out why people like handcuffs.
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
Randomize
