we went through the mcdonalds drive through and you asked for a free sample of their fries to see how you liked them.
Here. I am here. I do not know where here is but it includes condom balloons, a keg castle, and a shaved goat. Do not find me...I am in post blackout heaven.
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
If i ever have a kid with an outie i'm giving it up for adoption
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He said I went to go sit outside and is promised I wouldn't leave he brings me a chair and I'm gone. He found me stumbling a half mile away in my socks
The air was thick with penises
How's dating the med student working out for you?
After we had sex last night he showed me where my spleen was.
A true anatomy project.
The ketchup exploded, and totally splooged his face and the wall. You could see the outline of his head in the wall splatter.
I had 17 beers 2 days ago. I'm not dad material yet
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We had sex on the bear rug. He said "you, me and the bear. This is bear-idise"
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
It was extremely weird and uncomfortable mid blow job she looks up and says " tell me Simon Cowell makes your dick hard"
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
I’m not sure she knows my name. She introduced me as “the fuck toy”
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