Maryland truck stops are full of people with killer mustaches
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
dinner with the girl I motorboated last semester wasn't as awkward as I thought it would be
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
He thinks MY vagina is tight. That's saying something.
bleeding from the face, sitting in a shopping cart and holding a wad of ripped caution tape. what else would i be doing?
i am one UTI away from banning your fingers from my vagina
i found you in bed eating fish fillets dipped in chocolate pudding
P.S. If you wake up before noon it still counts as morning sex
You have to commit to sexting. You can't just quit right after I send you pictures of my asshole.
Seriously, come on.
I feel like there's a picture of my ass on the internet right now.
I hate you.
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
We decided it was a good idea to go streaking through the campus. Everything was fine until the sprinklers turned on and we realized the keys were in his pocket.
ugffhh I have work in 4 hours and have recieved zero sleep, seeing that I'm trapped in the arms of a snoring bear man. can't. breathe. lost in the forestry of his chest hair.
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
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