so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
My alcohol tolerance is way too high for this paycheck.
He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.
I found out why they kept calling her "CD". It was short for "Crab Dip". You're fucked.
I probably should have waited until after the game to pity fuck him. You know, seeing as we lost.
I got to see a stripper that did magic last night. It was glorious.
I made everything so magnificently awkward in under 15 seconds. I am magic.
I just sent a bad sext to my sister. There's not even a way to damage control this, is there?
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
I was riding him and in the middle he literally said "fuck yeah, Amy Winehouse"
Hella random but just hear me out...A bar that is a petting zoo. Bitches love petting zoos.
I'm going to tell you something and I want no judgement because it's america day and I'm wearing an American flag bathing suit but...I woke up in a yard.
You know when you're a kid and you play at the pool until you passed out? It was like that except instead of playing it was sex.
Randomize
