I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
i feel like im doing the pre-walk of shame..like every car that drives by is like, ooooo look at that girl, in that itty bitty dress, yep shes about to get her skank on tonight...
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
The last time you said "no one will know" is when you ran out of sprite at your birthday party and dumped a handle of straight up vodka into the jungle juice.
Well... this vagina won't eat itself
I just puked in my non fat yogurt... But it's non fat in hopes that someone wants to eat my vagina
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
If you're staying here tonight, you need to promise me you won't make another bonfire in the lounge room. My girl is still pissed about that.
I've started day drinking because fuck everyone else
Dude. I'm no longer allowed to use my sword when drinking. I just spent 20 min cleaning up popcorn. I stabbed Moe in the leg and chopped his door knob off
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
His 89 y/o father walked in on us. Judging by the gasp/moan, I don't think the 1920s prepared him to see another dude inside his son.
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
I did not get pleasing results from googling “Bob Ross goat”
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
Randomize
