Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
She started doing push ups and calling me a pussy. Never set me up with your ROTC friends again.
i came on her dog
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
Out of all the things I've put my penis in, this seems the most unfortunate.
he suggested we do it doggy style cuz it was his dead dogs birthday...i had to do it
Fuck away man. Like 3% of these new people will be back next week. This is the best week of the year to slam bitches at the gym.
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
I thought he was having it in Athens. Alright. Have fun. Please save my dignity and refrain from talking about my boobs and sexual "abilities". If I have any. I just feel like they are going to ask. Repeat after me. And repeat it 5 more times. This is going to be the phrase you're going to rely on tonight: "I can neither deny or confirm such actions."
ok so i took my anxiety medication and i'm eating junior mints and i think my vagina will be ok
That is priceless. You walk into her house, fuck her husband and demand Chinese food. Your an inspiration to us all.
Also I like oatmeal more than sex.
I don’t have enough daddy issues for this shit, make him go away
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