we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
I'm at some bar in brklyn... just made out with a guy named Owen.
He is a pre-school teacher... just sang me a song about weather.
9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
you kind of just crawled on top of him. that was the point at which i became concerned with how drunk you were.
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Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
She kept asking for cigarettes, than just put them in her purse as "savings"
I was just the victim of a drive by judging in a horse and buggy.
The fuck? Where?
St. Mary's. Amish people. Too high for this.
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Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
UGH FUCK THIS TRAFFIC I WANNA SUCK A DICK
Sorry I peed on your ottoman
There is a pool of ranch salad dressing in my purse...I know thats always been something you've wanted to try..so don't even act like you didn't do this.
You crawled into bed with Bob and started whispering to him about produce.
Today is a good day to get high. It's easy to blame the glazed-over look in my eye on my new contacts