i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
What the hell do I have to do to get some foreplay around here? This sucks.
I think you know the answer.
How can I marinade myself in Vodka?
and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
she carries around a jar of peanut butter. "just in case".
I don't know what I should tell you tell you. I don't want to encourage you to dye my dog.
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
Until she magically finds a brain, I'm going to be a dick. Fair trade. She's a idiot, I'm an ass.
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
Brandon's Recipe: two parts cocoa, one part sugar, one part milk, two parts four, 378 parts paranoia. Thanks for the fucking brownies, bitch.
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
Dude my body has gone into shock from not eating frozen pizza and chips. I've been shitting like Richard Simmons after a night out of twerking in a corn field
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
Sorry for yelling at you, I'm just really emotional about missing comicon.
IM HAMMERED AND JUST HAD CHEESECAKE THAT MADE ME FEEL LIKE NO MAN HAS EVER MADE BE FEEL BEFORE.
Randomize
