Most awkward thing ever: Meeting your BattleShits opponent post war.
I think thanksgiving was created so we could all be thankful that we're still alive after the night before.
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up next to her this morning and couldn't remember her name. Luckily, she had written it on my hand so that I could add her on facebook.
All I wanna do is sit in water and get drunk. The only thing more American is giving birth to eagles.
I mean I had a leg brace. It would have been irresponsible for me to be on top.
should my penis look like a turkey
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I swear she's a drunk klepto...by the end of the night she had stolen 3 bowling balls. HOW DO YOU STEAL 3 BOWLING BALLS?
at first i was on the bathroom floor cuz i was hungover. now im just here because it is cool
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
The Blue Grotto manager called. He asked me for your name and number. Apparently, on reviewing the videotape he noticed you consumed a whole pizza by yourself. He indicated that he has a tshirt for you and wants to put your picture on his eating wall of fame. Apparently, you are the first such person to complete this incredible feat of eating. Congratulations to you!! I am so proud.
Lesson learned. No more vodka and toaster strudel
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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