Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
i officially have over $300 in my bank account. that's a year's worth of chipotle.
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
Omg. I'm making you a chocolate and "herb" birthday cake and using joints for candles. I'm gunna need moms help with this!
He didn't call me beautiful but he came in less than five minutes so same thing, right?
If you hear death cries, thats me singing. Just let me be.
Come home, I'm drunk on the porch and pretending to smoke breadsticks like cigarettes. Enticing, right?
I think he thought I was too drunk to handle his parrot
Cocaine bath bombs are a really bad idea
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
Randomize
