i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
Hi, I just found this phone under my seat at a brewers game and seeing as you're entered in as 'fillllatio' I figured I'd ask you if you know the illiterate ass who owns this phone. Thanks :)
I would like to meet someone who actually lost their virginity in a candle filled room
bubblegum was invented today. we're getting drunk. end of story.
toilet paper cling ons are not as adorable as the little red cub makes them look on the charmin commercials.
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
I watched her choke out a bouncer with the broken strap from her purse, I think shes the one.
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
We ended up getting arrested after we flagged down the cops for a ride home with open beers in our hands... turns out the "nobody told me" excuse doesn't cut it anymore
we need to find an occasion to wear tutus
You demanded I give you a glass of water, so I set it down in front of you and you knock it over and roll in it..,
I wanted to be a dolphin.
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
I woke up and there was pizza slices on the fucking walls of my room
After the first time we had sex he kept saying "I'm proud of you" over and over again