I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
My brain says no but my pants say off.
My mom just drunkenly told me i was conceived in the back of a car, at a Bon Jovi concert.
I just puked in the mop bucket at work. I think I need to go home.
He had a huge mole on his dick. Genetics has cockblocked him for life.
the only good thing about him lasting five minutes was that nobody thinks i had sex with him or that im a slut because we were only in the bathroom for five minutes
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
I'm surprised I haven't crapped out a leprechaun, I'm so hungover
Well I'll be shitfaced all day the 4th in honor of this great nation... but I'm down for drunken camping/nature fucking on the 5th
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
someday i'll meet a woman who will love me for my marvelous breasts and ignore my many character faults.
He took me home and by the time I woke up after catching up on sleep I realized I accidentally put on one of his fiances socks. whoops.
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
THEY'RE TEXTING LIKE MIDDLE AGED SOCCER MOMS WHAT DO I DO
Apparently stoned me thought eating chips in the shower was a good idea.
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