I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is today national text-a-girl-whose-had-your-dick-in-her-mouth day and I just wasn't aware?? I am getting the most random "just saying hey" texts ever and that's the only common denominator.
bringing a ziploc bag full of Jim Beam to the movies may not have been the best idea.
she got the salsa and pickles out of the fridge looked at me and said what can i make with this
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found your pet lobster in the bathroom this morning. I went to return it to you but it escaped.
I am so hung over a medically induced coma is beginning to sound appealing.
I really need to create fewer "the time I was on drugs" stories for my future memoir, "my first year in San Francisco".
good luck with that
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
All I'm saying is that any 24 year old guy who sends me a snapchat from the vantage point of his dick with the caption "hiding behind my weiner" is off my list potentially dateable guys.
i'm really sorry, but i'm just not sober enough to make good decisions.
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