Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
dude.. you lit a cigarette on the bus and told the driver it was okay because you were fire marshall of your boy scout troop
my mom just asked me what a queef is. she needs to stop watching south park
Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
The boys in front of me put beer, red plastic cups, ping pong balls, lighterfluid, and twelve packs of pantyhose on the conveyor belt. Whatever drinking game they're playing, I want a part in.
Is it possible to dent your eyeball? And how do you "accidentally" go cosmic bowling?
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
I like to get drunk just like anyone else but not to the point of sticking a rubber tube up my asshole
You can't mix blow jobs, bacon, and Star Wars.
A) just did. And b-z) that sounds like a great Sunday morning.
I told the guy that if he didn't put enough pepperoni to earn the name " pepperoni feast", that I was gonna sue him for all he had. Believe it or not, that's all I remember.
Dude... She just sent me a story of how she wants to fuck me on a boat and call me her captain.. Well ahoy mateys, lets set sail
Sally, Your mom and my mom hooked up in college, we must uphold this tradition.
Plus, I have my cousin, the dominatrix, to help me out if things get out of hand
So we were fooling around last night and suddenly Like A Virgin popped up on his itunes
OMG haha What did he say?
He told me that if I laughed, I would have to leave.
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