There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
Apparently on the way out of the ER i asked the nurse to doggie-bag me some more morphine.
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
if you count grabbing my crotch as an introduction then yeah i got a couple of those tonight
UPDATE: lighting the grill with Bacardi. Haven't slept. Forgot the hamburger buns. Almost out of our eighth handle.
I'm such a fucking super-fan. I was worried his cum would wash away his autograph.
Seriously? He's going to use MY birthday sex as the opportunity to ask if he can pee on me?!? I let him, but wow talk about selfish.
Okay! I've got my sketchbook, my purse, my coat, and a knife hidden in my cleavage. I'm ready for to meet my blind date~
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
Had weird bad dreams about you last night. Please tell me you didn't google my real surname and that you don't go to a needle exchange.
Dollars spent: $83, Girls kissed: 4, Girls slept with:2, Girls currently making me breakfast: 1, Fucks given: 0
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
He literally just laid flat on top of me motionless at one point. It felt less like foreplay and more like he was trying to use me as a flotation device. 0/10
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
Randomize
