Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
He keeps apologizing for not being able to get hard when he's drunk. We havent even left the club yet.
he just told me he'd rather go to the pirates game. i know it was desperate but i said id give him roadhead if he let me come along.
I told myself this year would be different, I wouldn't get "pee in a fish tank drunk".. Got to the girls house... Fish tank in her room.. 2 years in a row.. had to keep the tradition going
Attention: due to the power outage we will not be playing drinking games and watching the royal wedding. Bring your own bottle and we'll just drink in silence.
He's cheating on his wife, and he's judging me for eating McDonalds
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
I had sex in the back of a hot foreign guy with a lacoste eye patch's car
She can't even plan ahead to have toilet paper for her next shit
Remember when we made out in a Chik-Fil-A drive thru?
Your liver needs more exercise - we start training tonight.
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
I had a dream that I was smoking rasberries out of a bong. THEY WEREN'T EVEN DRIED...
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