Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
I considered driving home in his mom's bathrobe until i realized i'd have to stop to buy cigarettes
I hate when you've made an ugly girl's day by having sex with her, and then she gets greedy and wants to cuddle after you cum.
then she made me sanitize my hands before fingering her...i may have found my soulmate
i never thought it was possible to fit gay, redneck and asian into the same sentence before i met you.
and this wasn't even the first one i'd hooked up with
Slurping strawberries throug a straw. It feels like the kool-aid man is coming in my mouth.
Can you fuck me on the kitchen counter at some point? I'll lysol it after
I just want you to know that I'm, like, 45% hard right now.
i forgot to brush my teeth before I went over so i went to the bathroom and started eating his toothpaste. we're still in the early stages of fuckdom
Sabotage it. Cum quick. Make it awkward so you don't hurt her feelings. Who says nice guys finish last?
I'm sorry I keep drunk texting your boyfriend sports updates.
That's okay. He needs friends too.
Anyone who can sit 4 hours in a doobie circle with their feet in a kiddie pool is ok by me
My school has hired a professional rum bottle juggler for our dining hall this evening.
I just saw a guy in a zippo shirt buy 2 gallons of fire starter fluid and then proceed to smoke a cigarette. I feel like hes got some big plans for his tuesday.
Next time I say "i forgot to eat dinner, oh well" before drinking STRAP ME TO A CHAIR AND FORCE FEED ME BEFORE ALLOWING ME TO CONSUME BOOZE
Randomize
